Comfort

The last week has been a very rough, emotional week for me. One of my students' brother died in a car accident, I met my new student who is homebound due to cancer, and we decided this week to file suit with our insurance company because they're refusing to pay for a surgery my husband had. Mark has been busy with the lawsuit and work all week, so when I'm home, I take care of the kids, dogs, house, etc. I'm tired, and I feel like a single parent sometimes. I know that's not Mark's fault..I don't blame him in any way. He's doing what needs to be done, but it's still hard on me.

And I'm so saddened by the lives of my students right now. I can't imagine losing a brother. And I can't imaging having a child in middle school who was strong and healthy 2 months ago and is now stricken with cancer and so weak that even writing a sentence tires her out.

So that said, I found myself several times this week seeking comfort in other things instead of going straight to God. Food, shopping, TV, whatever...it's comforting and makes us feel good, but should we really expect these things to last and sooth our soul for any amount of time? During these times when I feel overwhelmed and need comfort, I should be turning to Him, not my creature comforts. He invites me to "wrestle" with Him and learn how to get what I need from Him, not things of this earth. It's so much easier to get my nails done or have some ice cream than to sit down and talk to God and let Him comfort me. What if it's not enough? What if it's hard? What if He makes me do things I don't want to do? That's all part of this journey, and it is hard. I will "wrestle" with Him and learn how to trust Him instead of turning to the world for comfort.